mme_rediska: (Default)
[personal profile] mme_rediska
There was a reason I started writing in a journal. I wanted to try and be more open. Tell things about myself, if only to myself. The idea is not working very well. Even my private posts are few and far between. I wonder, why am I so secretive?

Take next.

I'm freshly unemployed. As of Monday morning. Not really a surprise, the layoff could be seen coming a mile away. It's still not exactly pleasant. The bottom line - the babysitting crisis brewing for this week died with a wimper, a new one materialized for the next few months, I updated a resume, talked to a headhunter (for about 2 hours), finally got to try out the new gym, had lunch with a friend, another lunch with the ex-coworkers and if I was supposed to be emotionally distraught over being kicked out on my ear - I must be in denial. Because I'm not.

Don't get me wrong. If I were to make an effort and wallow in self-pity I'm sure I could talk myself into a hysterical fit. But it's such an unpleasant experience, the hysterical fit, that I don't feel like doing it.

I saw an idea somewhere in comments to somebody's post somewhere (precision is key!) that whatever it is that some men sublimate into Ideas and Literature, in women is safely dissipated into maternal instinct and/or sex. I think that's what it was. Therefore, since I'm already immune to Ideas and Literature I can safely sublimate whatever career issues I have suppressed into sex. Good.

Incidentally, there seem to be two main approaches to Literature (tm).
1. This book isn't that great. I can do better. Therefore the Literature is dead.
2. This book isn't that great. I can do better. Therefore I'm Literature.


P.S. Not bad. Sex - check. Tangent - check. Zero informational load - check. Yep. That's me.
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mme_rediska

August 2009

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